Day 29 of my 30-day challenge to exercise and meditate for 15 minutes each, every day and then document my process. I didn’t even try to meditate in the morning. I’m certain it would have an effect on my day if I did. Perhaps I can meditate on the reason why I resist something I know will benefit me. Asking the questions is the first step, right? Someday I’ll get the answer. I had a busy day at work and a few meetings. The meetings went okay but I was a little annoyed with our employees and the questions they asked. I forget people are human and have their own concerns too. I seem to forget I was in their spot not too long ago. I also forget how quickly the human species is driven by their ego and only focused on themselves. I don’t know why I would ever expect anything different or why I get annoyed at the human condition. We are who we are.
After I got off of work I had to run over to a site to let a client know her landlord wouldn’t let her have a dog. I am fine with people hating me as I know it is rarely about me. As long as I am okay with looking myself in the mirror and knowing I did the best I could, then I am okay with my actions.
After work, I took my dog for the easy walk by the river with lots of benches. As my dog and I started walking she ran over to the edge of the river and put her mouth over a bird. I screamed loudly and told her to leave the bird alone. She unlatched her jaws from the poor helpless bird and it waddled off the other direction quickly. It broke my heart my dog hurt the bird. I love my dog, I really do but I have no idea how I got a dog that is an excellent hunter. Why does she have to kill so many helpless animals? I really wish she didn’t. I also really wish it didn’t bring her so much joy killing.
We walked along the river for about 45 minutes. The river was very high and close to the old casino the river was up over the ledge and the walkway next to the river was flooded. It made us take a slight detour but it was still an enjoyable walk for the most part. As we got close to my car I sat on a bench and meditated staring into the river. I let my thoughts go free and they took me to my future. I thought of all of the changes I would like to make in this world and how lovely it would be to have world peace. I know it will be difficult and it will take a while but we are capable of it.
My dog started to get antsy and wanted to continue so we started walking closer to my car to go home. There was so much debris from the river rising over the edge of the river. There were broken branches and moss all over the walkway I couldn’t see anything else. I was sure to keep an eye out for the poor bird from earlier but I didn’t see anything moving so I hoped the bird moved on further down. All of a sudden my dog lunged for something and as I turned it was the poor bird again. I yelled at Fresca to let her go. As I did Fresca let go and the bird flew into the water but it looked injured. The bird flapped its wings to stay afloat and went under the Fire Department shed thing that is in the water. I don’t understand what the structure is or what it is for but the little bird found it’s way underneath it. I asked my angles and guardians to go to the little bird and protect it and to send it healing energy. I felt so bad for the little bird and I did blame myself for not having better control over my dog. I really hope the bird is okay. Poor little bird.

 

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